Today I did my last kinder duty with my daughter. For three hours I talked to 4 and 5 year olds, helped them with puzzles, hung their paintings to dry, watched them play and talked to the kinder teachers. It got me thinking that as one phase of my life ends, another one begins, with both children being at school next year. But there have been other phases of my life, and other things that I have done and will never do again, either by life changes, or simply because I don’t want to.
1. I will never eat brussels sprouts again. I’m a grownup, I don’t have to eat this much-maligned vegetable. I had to eat them when I was younger, gagging on them at dinner-time, because my parents insisted. If the kids want to eat them at Christmas time at my parent’s place, I am more than happy to oblige them and pop one on their plate, but so far they have refused.
2. I will never record a song off the radio onto a tape. I don’t have any spare blank tapes, nor a radio tape player, as I have youTube, iTunes and an iPod which allows me to access music on demand, rather than being prey to the whims of radio programmers. We still have tapes at home and I think I still have a mixed tape on which Mr BG recorded some music for me when we started going out. The VCR is also gathering dust, as we haven’t upgraded to a DVR and we can’t record from the digital signal. Instead we wait for DVDs or I watch iView for the occasional show I may have missed.
3. I will never have kids again- save for an immaculate conception, that is. That means no enforced absence from alcohol for years, no breastfeeding around the clock, no prams in the boot of the car, and no teething issues. The interrupted sleep is still a factor in my life though :).
4. I never have to listen to The Wiggles again, as the kids have long outgrown them. It was a phase in their lives, and we have the DVDs to prove it! I pretty much lost faith in them when it was decided Greg would come back and replace Sam after 5 years. The way in which it was poorly managed and the persistence that children wouldn’t think twice about a new/old Yellow Wiggle made me glad it was something my kids missed. However, what I do have to put up with no is One Direction and Gangnam Style…
5. I will never see my granda again, nor will I see my parents in law. My mother in law met Master BG when he was a baby, but never got a chance to meet Miss BG. We have a crocheted rug which is a favourite picnic rug for her dollies, that she knows comes from her nanna Margaret.
6. I will never see another new episode of Deadwood, The Wire, Lost, Buffy. Now you know why I don’t bother getting a DVR- none of the shows on telly are what I want to watch!
7. I will never not feel guilty about something- I’m not spending enough time with my kids, Mr BG, not exercising enough, not eating the right foods, eating too much, not being a good worker, good daughter, good sister, not doing the housework. Actually I lie- I never feel guilty about not doing the housework…